Today was rough. It seems the cycle of good to bad to good again was moving at such a pace that made today almost completely useless. I have a lot of work and was able to bury myself in it but it was difficult nonetheless. Suffice it to say that today was a day best spent alone in my office and not interacting with others. This is not always possible and for those moments I had to dig deep to get composure. I delegated some things out today and that helped a ton.
All my kids are fighting some kind of cold. Yay! I suppose I should look at the positive side. All my kids are working on becoming immune to every sickness kids pass around.
I went for a walk today. I was not able to "process" anything. I just listened to the birds and watched/listened to the squirrels. I even saw a rabbit. I enjoy seeing them. They are cute. I don't really feel like I can relax when I am out probably because I feel guilty for being out. I think this will change with time. I may need to do something that is more engaging than just strolling down a trail.
I'm going to sleep to try to get some energy. I just felt a lot of emotions today that just zapped my energy. I don't know how people heal while trying to live their "normal" lives. Healing takes so much attention that I have not figured out how to focus on healing AND live my life. It is like removing splinters in your hand while on a roller coaster. It just seems pointless. It seems easier to just hold on and endure the ride and then after focus on removing the splinter which at this point is festered and infected. Yay! Well, sleep is healing, right? So... off I go.
