30 March 2015 (100 days after The Day)

Today was a very tough day.  Lots of memories and lots of processing of emotions.  To top it off as a family event we went to visit Jan.  I had not been in a few weeks and I just fell apart there.  So on a lighter note, I think I may have identified something I can do just for me. 

I'm running on fumes and have no desire to sleep.  I think a lot of this has to do with my father.  I spoke with my sister tonight and the discussion had me take a trip down memory lane.  I recalled how I just really did not agree with his life choices.  It is the type of stuff that you just shake you head in disbelief and give a sigh.  This is the type of stuff that will zap your energy because there is nothing you can do about it.  I can do nothing but I still continue to think on his life even though he died in July.  All I have to say is ... What a mess.

I need to make the bottles for Claire and then I think I will force myself to go to bed.