28 June 2015 (190 days after The Day)

So yesterday was an interesting day.  Church and hanging out with the family.  Church was very difficult for me.  I don't know why.  It just was.  Sometimes I feel like I should be doing more... doing more but not able to become more... or maybe becoming more just very slowly.  This metamorphosis I feel I am going through is not a quick process.  I want it to be quick.  I want to just wave a magic wand and poof - everything is better.  Not the case.  It is most difficult work.  Difficult work that requires all of your attention- oh - and by the way - you still need to function in society.  I admire anyone who has gone through this or some other life-changing moment.