I only had to get my daughter to move once in the night. That is amazing. I slept. I also had a dream. I suppose it would be good to share that I generally don't recall any of my dreams and last night is also true to this statement except for one thing. Jan and I had previous conversations on things she and I are passionate on. These things had slipped from my memory entirely because of the chaos of all that has occurred. In my dream my wife and I had a discussion where she asked about these things. Whether it is inspiration or something else entirely I do not know. I am just glad I had this dream to start the process of getting other things in order.
I started looking at headstones. I found that I could get one for about 1K that looked decent but the installation of the headstone is about .55 cents per sq inch. In English that means for a normal headstone I will pay 1K and then another 4K for the install. I'm just sick with the costs of this stuff.
9:19 pm
Ammon and Madilyn in my bed again tonight. I spent a portion of the day with Claire. She is doing much better. She is no longer on any oxygen or CPAP or ventilator. She is just breathing normal air! Yay! She completed her brain tests and the Neurologist indicated that she had a hemorrhage on the back right portion of her brain that is no longer bleeding. That portion of the brain works with associations. The Dr. believes this may be the cause of the seizures. At any rate he said her brain waves look fine for when she is awake and a little off when she is sleeping. They will keep an eye on her but so far the outlook is more positive. He did say we are not out of the woods yet. I asked when we would be and he shared it may take a few years to see what if any effects this may cause. So, here is keeping my fingers crossed for a few years. He said until the blood from the hemorrhage is absorbed there is still a chance for a seizure so the medications to control that part are still being administered.
I still have trouble believing this is all happening. I expect to see my wife walk in at any moment and I wouldn't think twice. I suppose I am just really sad. I am amazed that some times in life you can be filled with such joy as you could ever imagine and you can also be filled with such grief as you could ever imagine. The polarities between the two truly make your appreciation of joy more and your resources to handle the negative greater. With all that being said this still sucks.
