Tom's daughter, Heather came up with her husband and kids. They ended up taking all of our homeschooling curriculum. I personally could not pack it. Samantha did. It was extremely difficult for me to see it all go into boxes. Heather took it all. I am so thankful that she did. It sounds weird but keeping stuff like that in the family or seeing it go to people who you know will use it makes the whole process easier. We loaded them up with gobs of stuff and now the house really really looks empty. No TV... limited seating...
Claire just smiled and cuddled with me today. I needed that.
Friday, November 13, 2015
11 Nov 2015 (326 days after The Day)
The week is flying by. Samantha's sister is coming to help us pack. That is such a relief. I had meetings that were solid from 8-5 and not a single break. Having that assistance has been huge. The house is slowly being put in boxes and I won't lie... it is difficult. My mind has been fixed on moving and work... When I walk in the door in the evenings more of our belongings are in a box... it is weird in a way.
Wednesday, November 11, 2015
10 Nov 2015 (325 days after The Day)
My day started at 5:00 when my alarm went off. I checked my email as usual and found that we had an application outage at work. It affected our overseas locations. After some discussion I found that the services were restored but there was a communication gap in the procedure. I marked this as a to-do on my agenda and the day began. I had meeting after meeting that consumed 100% of the day. There was very little room for breathing and was a mixture of both work meetings and meetings with movers. I received quotes from all three movers by the end of the day. Their prices were relatively similar but their weight estimates varied by as much as 3K pounds. I don't know if that is normal but it seemed a bit odd for me. As the evening moved on we packed the kitchen and grandma's room where we have our books. I found a lot of Jan's journals. I was so happy to find them and a little sad reading some passages where you could see the challenges she dealt with as her memories returned of such horrific events in her childhood. I just wish I could give her a hug and let her know I love her. It is a silly thing I suppose. I mean, she is in a place now that is filled with love.
Our home is filled with stuff that is going to other people's homes... it will feel much better I think once we get this stuff out of our home. The move date is fast approaching and everything still feels like a dream.
Our home is filled with stuff that is going to other people's homes... it will feel much better I think once we get this stuff out of our home. The move date is fast approaching and everything still feels like a dream.
09 Nov 2015 (324 days after The Day)
Monday has come. A blizzard of a day working and then coming home and packing. We met with a moving company. Not having a clue what the cost would be I was preparing for the worst. At the end of the meeting he said thank you and that he would send us a quote. I was left wondering what the cost would be. We were a bit discouraged but sat down for dinner. About 10 min into dinner the doorbell rang and our Realtor came over. We discussed the house and what it would take to sell... what improvements would need to be made and the schedule. Jan's name is still on the house so having to get a death certificate and deal with that brought memories up for me. It was difficult. After discussing everything she left with a game-plan and that was one major item checked off my list. After packing some more I retired to bed exhausted.
Sunday, November 8, 2015
08 Nov 2015 (323 days after The Day)
So today started out with a bit of humor. We went to church only to realize that we were early. Two hours early. There was a special conference so we packed up the family and went back home. We returned later to the service and it was completely packed. It was good to go. There is something about being in the right place at the right time and feeling the spirit. So - that was a plus for the day.
We came home and focused on more packing and purging. We went through the kitchen.. well... at least we started going through the kitchen. As we went through our stuff every item seemed to have a memory attached to it - from the wooden spoon that was burnt... to a pampered chef chopping device. All items that I held brought back memories of using that item. Like I said in the previous post - it is good to go through it all and purge.
By the time evening came around I felt completely drained. It was an odd feeling. But... drained was how I felt. I slept a bit on the couch while everyone watched Studio C. Claire was determined to play with me while I was on the couch. She is so cute. She walks around the furniture as she hold on and you can see her eyes get inspired when she looks at something with interest. It is so cute. I love that little girl.
We came home and focused on more packing and purging. We went through the kitchen.. well... at least we started going through the kitchen. As we went through our stuff every item seemed to have a memory attached to it - from the wooden spoon that was burnt... to a pampered chef chopping device. All items that I held brought back memories of using that item. Like I said in the previous post - it is good to go through it all and purge.
By the time evening came around I felt completely drained. It was an odd feeling. But... drained was how I felt. I slept a bit on the couch while everyone watched Studio C. Claire was determined to play with me while I was on the couch. She is so cute. She walks around the furniture as she hold on and you can see her eyes get inspired when she looks at something with interest. It is so cute. I love that little girl.
07 Nov 2015 (322 days after The Day)
Today I started the hard part - packing and purging the big items. It started in the back yard. I disassembled the trampoline. Some friends of ours picked it up but the process of taking it down reminded me of the time I put it together. Lots of memories and I suppose that will be the story of moving. Lots of memories and deciding what is worth packing up ... and what is not.
I have come to understand that purging is almost as nice as repenting. Getting rid of stuff that you have held onto for so long has a bit of freedom with it. No longer do I feel bogged down with items that have value... just not for me. I felt like a steward of a warehouse of stuff that I would not use. I am glad we are able to purge and be free of the stuff that was accumulated over the years.
I have come to understand that purging is almost as nice as repenting. Getting rid of stuff that you have held onto for so long has a bit of freedom with it. No longer do I feel bogged down with items that have value... just not for me. I felt like a steward of a warehouse of stuff that I would not use. I am glad we are able to purge and be free of the stuff that was accumulated over the years.
06 Nov 2015 (321 days after The Day)
Friday has come. It is amazing how quickly time flies. I had my "last" physical therapy visit today. For those that have had this before it is somewhat standard. The same activities every time make for a somewhat automated time. As I went from activity to activity I realized that over the past few months my body had really healed or perhaps repaired itself enough to heal. I found myself feeling better about my ability to walk and get around. My knee is still torn up but my muscles are much better at supporting my injury. I left physical therapy feeling absolutely exhausted. I strive to push myself beyond my comfort zone. I do this at work and at all things I am engaged in... at least - I try to.
As I went through the day I felt like I was checking things off my list. That is very comforting. I look on my daily things I do with PT or with work and realize that this very same pattern I have used when healing my grief. One small step at a time. Some have questioned why I have decided to remarry at the time that I did. My answer is simple. I am unwilling to live in grief. Love heals. The grieving process seems to go on and on at times. Sometimes it is silent... and at other times it seems to scream at you from all directions. As I go through my home and pack, for example, it screams... from one item to another. It is just draining.
As I went through the day I felt like I was checking things off my list. That is very comforting. I look on my daily things I do with PT or with work and realize that this very same pattern I have used when healing my grief. One small step at a time. Some have questioned why I have decided to remarry at the time that I did. My answer is simple. I am unwilling to live in grief. Love heals. The grieving process seems to go on and on at times. Sometimes it is silent... and at other times it seems to scream at you from all directions. As I go through my home and pack, for example, it screams... from one item to another. It is just draining.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)